another pointless update...

just another song I've been listening to a lot lately. 

"New Slang"

Gold teeth and a curse for this town were all in my mouth. 
Only, i don't know how they got out, dear. 
Turn me back into the pet that i was when we met. 
I was happier then with no mind-set. 

And if you'd 'a took to me like 
A gull takes to the wind. 
Well, i'd 'a jumped from my tree 
And i'd a danced like the king of the eyesores 
And the rest of our lives would 'a fared well. 

New slang when you notice the stripes, the dirt in your fries. 
Hope it's right when you die, old and bony. 
Dawn breaks like a bull through the hall, 
Never should have called 
But my head's to the wall and i'm lonely. 

And if you'd 'a took to me like 
A gull takes to the wind. 
Well, i'd 'a jumped from my tree 
And i'd a danced like the king of the eyesores 
And the rest of our lives would 'a fared well. 

God speed all the bakers at dawn may they all cut their thumbs, 
And bleed into their buns 'till they melt away. 

I'm looking in on the good life i might be doomed never to find. 
Without a trust or flaming fields am i too dumb to refine? 
And if you'd 'a took to me like 
Well i'd a danced like the queen of the eyesores 
And the rest of our lives would 'a fared well.

There seems to be a few official filmclips for this song floating around, but this is the one I like the best, watch it if you want.

I'm off to NSW for a few days tomorrow. I guess it's really just a 'see both sides of the family' for my birthday type occasion. I guess it's kind of ironic that we'll probably have 2 big, meat filled dinners to celebrate the birthday of yours truly, the only vegetarian in the family. I don't really know how I feel about that haha, but I guess it's not really a big deal... they'd all eat meat regardless of what they were celebrating. It seems to be what people do.

I have a doctor's appointment on Tuesday when I get back and I guess that scares me a bit. It's not the going to the doctor bit that scares me I guess, it's what happens after. I'm going their primarily for two things: to get a referral to see a hearing specialist again because I was told to return in 6 months or so if none of my hearing problems had improved and they haven't, so I guess there's not much more I can do except try again and two, the scarier of the two, to get a referral to a pyscholigist. After an incident last weekend where I almost punched one of my housemate's in the head over something stupid, hit myself in the head about 8 times to try and calm myself down and then immediately burst into tears, I guess I decided that enough was enough and maybe I can't deal with everything in my life alone. It's weird, I sit here now and I feel fine, not great, but fine, like I don't think the person sitting here right now needs professional help, but then something bad happens and everything just seems to fall apart and I guess while the thought of paying someone to try and deal with your problems is scary as fuck, maybe it's all I can do.

I guess I'll let this one stew while I'm gone... 

to the one or two people who actually read my blog, good night.